yoohoo! hot sauce please
10:27, 7 September 2026 (UTC)
User:Taro: Difference between revisions
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Add way more fortunes |
m Admin moved page User:Taro to User:Taro without leaving a redirect: Complete requested rename to Taro |
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<option>You will fix a bug today. Or cause one. 50/50.</option> | <option>You will fix a bug today. Or cause one. 50/50.</option> | ||
<option>A wild exploit is about to appear.</option> | <option><span class="Taro-fortune-warn">A wild exploit is about to appear.</span></option> | ||
<option>Root is a state of mind.</option> | <option><span class="Taro-glow">Root is a state of mind.</span></option> | ||
<option>Restart cloudflared. You know why.</option> | <option><span class="Taro-glow">Restart cloudflared. You know why.</span></option> | ||
<option>Trust nothing. Especially this fortune.</option> | <option>Trust nothing. Especially this fortune.</option> | ||
<option>Somewhere, a server is on fire. Probably not this one. Probably.</option> | <option><span class="Taro-fortune-warn">Somewhere, a server is on fire. Probably not this one. Probably.</span></option> | ||
<option>The site will not break today. Probably.</option> | <option><span class="Taro-fortune-warn">The site will not break today. Probably.</span></option> | ||
<option>A patch is coming. Nobody knows when.</option> | <option><span class="Taro-fortune-whisper">A patch is coming. Nobody knows when.</span></option> | ||
<option>Your uptime is a lie and you know it.</option> | <option><span class="Taro-glow">Your uptime is a lie and you know it.</span></option> | ||
<option>Someone is trying to SQL inject the guestbook right now. Good luck to them.</option> | <option><span class="Taro-fortune-warn">Someone is trying to SQL inject the guestbook right now. Good luck to them.</span></option> | ||
<option>You forgot your own password again, didn't you.</option> | <option><span class="Taro-fortune-warn">You forgot your own password again, didn't you.</span></option> | ||
<option>The logs see everything.</option> | <option>The logs see everything.</option> | ||
<option>Today's threat level was rolled with a d20. It landed on a 1.</option> | <option>Today's threat level was rolled with a d20. It landed on a 1.</option> | ||
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<option>2swagg has never gone down. This is technically true.</option> | <option>2swagg has never gone down. This is technically true.</option> | ||
<option>You will read this fortune again in five minutes hoping for a better one.</option> | <option>You will read this fortune again in five minutes hoping for a better one.</option> | ||
<option>The backups exist. Somewhere. Probably.</option> | <option><span class="Taro-fortune-whisper">The backups exist. Somewhere. Probably.</span></option> | ||
<option>Coffee levels critical. Refill immediately.</option> | <option><span class="Taro-fortune-warn">Coffee levels critical. Refill immediately.</span></option> | ||
<option>This page has more CSS than some entire websites.</option> | <option>This page has more CSS than some entire websites.</option> | ||
<option>Renaming yourself again is not off the table.</option> | <option>Renaming yourself again is not off the table.</option> | ||
<option>A stray troll edit brings good luck.</option> | <option>A stray troll edit brings good luck.</option> | ||
<option>Your code will fix itself. It always does.</option> | <option>Your code will fix itself. It always does.</option> | ||
<option>The cloudflared tunnel dreams of never being restarted again. It will be restarted again.</option> | <option><span class="Taro-glow">The cloudflared tunnel dreams of never being restarted again. It will be restarted again.</span></option> | ||
<option>Somewhere a dependency just went end of life.</option> | <option><span class="Taro-fortune-whisper">Somewhere a dependency just went end of life.</span></option> | ||
<option>You are being watched by exactly one (1) hit counter.</option> | <option><span class="Taro-fortune-warn">You are being watched by exactly one (1) hit counter.</span></option> | ||
<option>A wild 500 error appears. It flees.</option> | <option>A wild 500 error appears. It flees.</option> | ||
<option>This fortune was chosen by a random number generator that trusts you completely.</option> | <option>This fortune was chosen by a random number generator that trusts you completely.</option> | ||
<option>Bugs fear you. Mildly.</option> | <option>Bugs fear you. Mildly.</option> | ||
<option>Today is a good day to not touch production.</option> | <option>Today is a good day to not touch production.</option> | ||
<option>Somewhere, JANNY is doing something.</option> | <option><span class="Taro-fortune-whisper">Somewhere, JANNY is doing something.</span></option> | ||
<option>The wiki remembers everything you tried to hide.</option> | <option>The wiki remembers everything you tried to hide.</option> | ||
<option>You have root. Use it wisely. Or don't.</option> | <option><span class="Taro-glow">You have root. Use it wisely. Or don't.</span></option> | ||
<option>Fortune not found. 404. This is also a fortune.</option> | <option><span class="Taro-fortune-shout">Fortune not found. 404. This is also a fortune.</span></option> | ||
<option>You will fat finger a command today. It will be fine. Probably.</option> | |||
<option><span class="Taro-fortune-whisper">A moderator is watching. They are bored.</span></option> | |||
<option>The database is fine. It is always fine. Until it isn't.</option> | |||
<option>Someone will ask you to fix their PC. You will not.</option> | |||
<option><span class="Taro-fortune-shout">Deploy on Friday. Live dangerously.</span></option> | |||
<option><span class="Taro-fortune-warn">rm -rf is always one typo away.</span></option> | |||
<option><span class="Taro-fortune-whisper">Your API key is in a commit somewhere. Find it before someone else does.</span></option> | |||
<option><span class="Taro-fortune-warn">A random extension will break for no reason today.</span></option> | |||
<option>The Cloudflare dashboard is lying to you right now.</option> | |||
<option>You will refresh this page fourteen more times looking for a good one.</option> | |||
<option><span class="Taro-fortune-whisper">Somewhere, a cron job silently failed six months ago and nobody noticed.</span></option> | |||
<option>Your commit message will just say "fix".</option> | |||
<option>The wiki is held together by hope and one Pi.</option> | |||
<option>You will read the documentation this time. You will not.</option> | |||
<option>A guest will sign the guestbook with something unhinged.</option> | |||
<option>Ping is fine. It's everything else that's broken.</option> | |||
<option><span class="Taro-fortune-whisper">Somewhere a test is passing that should not be.</span></option> | |||
<option><span class="Taro-fortune-shout">You will blame DNS. It will not be DNS. It is always DNS.</span></option> | |||
<option>A capcode means nothing without the will to use it.</option> | |||
<option>Today you will open twelve tabs and close none of them.</option> | |||
<option>The mods are asleep. Post the forbidden edit.</option> | |||
<option>Your password manager judges you silently.</option> | |||
<option>A wild memory leak has appeared. It is winning.</option> | |||
<option>This wiki has survived worse than you.</option> | |||
<option>Somewhere, a bot is trying your default admin password. It will not work. Probably.</option> | |||
<option>You are one config change away from taking down the whole site.</option> | |||
<option>The changelog says "misc fixes." Nobody knows what that means.</option> | |||
<option>A stray semicolon will cost you an hour today.</option> | |||
<option>Your uptime graph has a suspicious gap nobody talks about.</option> | |||
<option>Somewhere, someone is reading this fortune out loud. Hi.</option> | |||
<option>The site is up. Don't jinx it.</option> | |||
<option>You will forget to restart cloudflared at least once more in this lifetime.</option> | |||
<option>A janitor will delete something important by accident. It was probably fine anyway.</option> | |||
<option>Your favorite bug is still open. It always will be.</option> | |||
<option>Somewhere, a rate limit is about to be hit.</option> | |||
<option>The server fans are getting loud. Ignore them.</option> | |||
<option>Today's exploit was patched yesterday. There's a new one now.</option> | |||
<option>You will Google the error message and find your own old forum post.</option> | |||
<option>A wild staff meeting has appeared. Nobody attends.</option> | |||
<option>This fortune is 100% accurate 12% of the time.</option> | |||
<option>Somewhere, an intern just pushed straight to main.</option> | |||
<option>You are the intern. There is no intern.</option> | |||
<option>The mascot is judging your uptime.</option> | |||
<option>A very normal amount of caffeine was consumed today. Lies.</option> | |||
<option>Somewhere, a moderator argued about a capcode for forty minutes.</option> | |||
<option>Your next commit will break the build. Or fix everything. Flip a coin.</option> | |||
<option>The site has one true god and it is whoever pays the hosting bill.</option> | |||
<option>Today you will learn a new keyboard shortcut and immediately forget it.</option> | |||
<option>Somewhere, a ticket has been open since launch day.</option> | |||
<option>You will not read this far. If you did, hello.</option> | |||
<option>The fortune generator has run out of ideas. This is fortune number infinity.</option> | |||
</choose> | </choose> | ||
Latest revision as of 00:39, 10 October 2026
security lead • developer • 2swagg • est. Aug 13 2026 • still hasn't slept • welcome •
About[edit | edit source]
Taro (aka Taro) is 2swagg staff: the site's security lead and a developer. His capcode is ## Developer 
.
As security lead, Taro fixes bugs and keeps the site from breaking, and actively checks 2swagg's security on an ongoing basis rather than as a one-off audit.
● online 
This page is entirely real and not fake in any way. Trust.
- Kept the site from exploding (so far)
- Renamed self from Taro to Taro and lived to tell the tale
- Has root
- Once fixed a bug
Nobody. This section is empty because Taro has no enemies. That you know of.
Stats[edit | edit source]
| Stat | Value |
|---|---|
| Uptime | 99.9% |
| Bugs fixed | yes |
| Exploits found | some |
| Coolness | immeasurable |
| Coffee consumed | 3284 (might be more~!) |
| Cloudflared restarts survived | 127 (and rising) |
| Threat level | ask again later |
| Root access | yes'nt |
This page alone has been viewed 979 times.
Fortune[edit | edit source]
Somewhere a test is passing that should not be.
Webring[edit | edit source]
Guestbook[edit | edit source]
| Visitor | Message |
|---|---|
| Taro | made this page myself, 10/10 no bias |
| you | (sign below by editing this page, or don't, whatever) |
faggot owns this account JANNY ## Mod ## Mod 06:47, 7 September 2026 (UTC)
